In recent years, sex education for puberty has always been a hot topic of discussion in the media. We all know that psychophysiological changes or the curious nature of children during puberty are natural. However, do parents, especially parents from Asian countries like Vietnam, really understand their children? Are we really dealing with puberty in the right way?
In order to reflect the story of puberty in Asian children, the famous film studio - Pixar has released the movie Turning Red - a fun and cute movie that leaves us thinking. The drama follows the upside down of Mei's life, a 13-year-old girl, as she enters puberty. Facing this transformation, Mei's family, especially her mother, Ming, sees this as a terrible period, and from there, conflicts between Mei and her family begin to erupt. Through a series of conflicts and character resolution, Turning Red portrays the false defense of Asian parents against their children's maturity.
RED PANDA - A METAPHOR FOR PUBERTY
Red pandas are rare animals that need to be preserved and currently live only in West Asian regions such as the Himalayas, Nepal, India, Bhutan, Myanmar, and South China. They are often known for their strikingly vibrant fur and mischievous appearance. However, few people know that red pandas are solitary animals as they avoid interaction with humans and enter a fighting stance if they feel threatened [1].
In "Turning Red," director Domee Shi uses the image of a red panda as a metaphor for puberty — when all female members of Mei's family are cursed to transform into red pandas when they reach adulthood. Puberty greets little Mei with a red, damp, and smelly "monster" — a detail that is said to be a metaphor for menstruation. In the following days, not only Mei's physiology but also her psyche gradually became more abnormal. She becomes distant from her family, agitated, and angry. She often turns into a bear and is ready to attack others when she cannot control her erratic emotions.
Facing puberty, Mei is fortunate to receive the attention of family and friends. Her family and friends, however, have diametrically opposed views of the change. If Mrs. Ming and her relatives see the red bear as a beast that needs to be confined, her peers see red panda Mei as an adorable and funny creature. It was this opposition that opened and, at the same time, pushed the mother-child conflict to the top.
PARENTS PROTECT THEIR CHILDREN THE WRONG WAY - CAUSE & CONTINUITY
According to director Domee Shi, she had been trying to build Mei's family different from the stereotypes of Asian parents - strict, emotionless, manipulating their children's lives for personal satisfaction [3]. She said that her parents, and every other Asian parent, want to protect their children from the "crazy" things they have all been through. However, pressures and misconceptions ingrained in the subconscious gradually form false protection for children.
According to research, Asian culture is one that values community. Therefore, Chinese people and Asians always seek respect and recognition from society, leading them to value their faces above all personal desires or feelings.[3][4] It's easy to find this expression in "Turning Red" when Ming repeatedly refers to the "red panda" as something dirty to hide — "no one should see her in this form." She ignores to talk to Mei about her first period but follows her all day to make sure nothing embarrassing happens. Similarly, Ming considers Mei's early feelings for boys bizarre or "trash." She discourages these feelings, believing them to be temptations to break her daughter's innocence.
WHEN OVER-ENVELOPMENT BECOMES A DOUBLE-EDGED
SWORD
All of these reactions and actions stem from Mrs. Ming's concern and protection for Mei, but she does not realize that it is she who causes Mei trouble. First of all, Mrs. Ming did not inform Mei of the existence of the "red panda" in advance, so Mei's experience was full of fear, panic, and self-doubt. Ming does not encourage Mei to understand her physiological changes leading to her always trying to suppress them instead of learning to reconcile abnormalities in her body. That repression, combined with the rigid concern and protection from the mother, created a mentality of resistance and rebellion. She begins lying to her family, neglecting her studies, freely letting go of negative emotions, and even hurting her family and friends.
Psychophysical education is essential and almost mandatory as children begin to reach puberty. However, Asian parents still face many obstacles in sex and gender discussion with their children. Most Vietnamese, especially those living in rural or mountainous areas, have never had clear and serious conversations with their parents [5]. Mei's rebellious image is only an example of the fact that in Asia and Vietnam, the lack of sex education has led to more serious consequences for young people.
Improper protection and education by adults push children's curiosity about sexuality out of control as they relieve themselves of that curiosity through unorthodox websites, acquire incorrect knowledge, and develop false actions or mentalities. According to Tuoi Tre newspaper, there are about 300,000 to 400,000 abortions in adolescents each year. In particular, hospitals also recorded countless cases of children who did not know they were pregnant or had sexually transmitted diseases because of a lack of knowledge [7].
SOLUTION: EMPATHIZE AND ACCOMPANY CHILDREN ON THE PATH OF MATURITY.
Reality shows that the children around Mei do not consider her change bizarre. They love playing with a completely different Mei. Thanks to the warm welcome and support, Mei's life turns colorful. She no longer feels uncomfortable or embarrassed about the physiological changes but becomes confident about her cute and "cool panda" appearance. She even made her first income with her friends by taking advantage of this appearance [3]. With the support and sharing from close friends, Mei has learned to tame negative emotions and develop positive traits. In the end, Mei does not have to choose between her old and new self. She gets the support and encouragement to balance the two aspects of her life.
Turning Red has approached puberty education in a fresh, unique but equally intimate way. Through the movie, we suddenly realize that, inside every adult human, there is always a "red panda" waiting to explode. Sometimes, the wrong protection and education will become a double-edged sword that turns the cute bear into a real "monster." The film also highlights that on the way to adulthood, children need a companion who can empathize, listen, and share the wrongs and wrongs in life [6]. From there, we can open many doors for our children to choose the right path for their own lives.